Question for the girls: How big of a problem are guys writing unwanted sexual private messages??

also, when proceed to ban someone for a certain amount of time from the website, don't ban their account, because the person can always make another account. Ban the IP address. In cases of forever banning the account, then the ban on IP address should be severe, something like 3-6 months that computer will not be able to access the page. Since not everyone knows how to fake IP address, and changing it is a hassle, only a small percentage will actually do it. This will also weed out a lot of harassers.

actually I feel very uncomfortable with it since it started the day when I just joined here.
but I wouldnt want the admins to read all the mails as well.
I think it's a good way here to keep privacy as much as possible (actual reason why my profile information went off).
What's also bothering is (for others as well as for me) all those connection requests from people who didn't even tried to get in contact first. that's REALLY annoying!

NorthKoreaIsBestKorea wrote:

TeaTime wrote: As it has been pointed out, female members are reluctant to report incidents of harassment.
This thread was made to try and encourage women to make reports. Your ridicule of this thread could put women off reporting incidents.

Why would they be reluctant if there obviously nothing wrong with their actions?

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I assume you are just an idiot troll. So I will explain it to you simply.

This has happened to me... a guy sends a message saying "hi" I reply back "hello"
He then sends an unsolicited detailed and graphic description of what he would like to do to me sexually. I being shocked and disgusted, immediately delete the message. Only later do I realise I should of kept it to show prof of his actions. As I have no proof I don't bother reporting.

It is embarrassing to get messages like this. It is embarrassing to have to report such messages.

Your putting any of the blame on to the victim is disgusting.

NorthKoreaIsBestKorea wrote:

Karyuu wrote: Dear female users, every once in a while we receive reports about guys writing pervert / sexual private messages to girls in a way that girls perceive as premature, pushy or harassing.

This is by the administration considered harassment, which is regarded as an offense and is punishable by minus points and ultimately a site ban.

(/rules-for-hey-ai See rules 2 & 3)

It seems that we hear from this more by third parties saying it happened to others, not by direct reports, so we are currently wondering whether there is a need to raise awareness and encourage direct reports from girls this happened to.


In addition, people also report guys who seem to use the site to find as many one-night stands as possible, sometimes pretending to be in search of a relationship but then disappearing after having had sex. (Which is currently not punishable by our site rules, however several people have been telling us it should be so we're giving this some consideration).
The poll itself is not about this, but for the people who experienced such guys and felt that encountering them on the site had a negative effect on their Hey-Ai experience, please comment and elaborate =)

This serves as a first overview for us to assess the extent of the problem. According to the result we'll thing about possible countermeasures.

Thanks everyone for participating in this poll, please only girls vote, guys are welcome to comment though^^

1.Definitely minus points or ban people that do this if you're going to ban or minus points from others for the most ridiculous shit ever.

2. So girls have one night stands with people they're trying to engage in a relationship with? I say ban the sluts, not the guy or create a thread where you can post individuals that "play" you.

OP, you should also call out all the females that have reported the one night stand issue.

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FEMALE LOGIC

^^^^^^^ LOL

Wouldn't you say these "One night stand guys" are actually grooming vulnerable and sometimes I'm assuming underaged girls?
A lot of the girls/women on here have not had a lot of experience regarding relationships. These net groomers message the girls with declarations of undying love. A love which the girls believe because the groomers make it so believable!
After many months of net dating or w/e the couple meet and the girl believes it's right so they sleep together! Is the girl a slut for sleeping with a guy who she thought she had a connection with for many months?

I don't think its practical to implement a rule that bans "One night stands". Hey-Ai aren't the police lol
The guy could just delete his account and up sticks to another social networking site of a similar nature. Hey-Ai could instead post a page informing females that there have been cases of these one night stands and the females should wait before engaging in any sexual activity.
Bottom line girls, you shouldn't trust what someone says on the net!

well. you didn't really tell me what you guys know so i assume I would be getting infos out from the ground up.... but you gotta give me credit for that censor idea

Connection Requests will usually go without trying to contact each other first. That has always been an issue and will stay an issue forever lol.

I'm pretty sure a lot of women get unwanted sexual pms but something tells me that most women don't really care and just delete. HOWEVER, it would be nice for more women to come out and give reports. Cleans up the website and makes it a better community.

I just find it funny how people can lower themselves to do that.
If you don't have enough selfrespect, you do stuff like that. That's why I like to think of those people as rejects and retards : D
Woohoo~

LinnieAlexis wrote: I just find it funny how people can lower themselves to do that.
If you don't have enough selfrespect, you do stuff like that. That's why I like to think of those people as rejects and retards : D
Woohoo~

maybe we can get this message pop up for every guy that was reported... it will scar them for life. It hurts my feelings reading it already... such harsh statements